Happy Monday! I hope you had a great Thanksgiving! Whether you spent it with family, friends, or solo I hope you found something to be grateful for. Over the weekend I had a wonderful time with my family, I even got stuck with them through a blizzard. All the time I was inside watching T.V., playing games, or shoveling I was wishing I could get be at a spa being nice and warm and getting a massage.
Massages, pedicures, trips, baths; these were all my ideas of self-care. I knew that list was different for everybody depending on their personal interests, but the idea was the same: things that were “relaxing”. I still believe those things are important and do make up a part of self-care, but I recently read something that has changed my view on what self-care should also look like.
We’ve been told by society that self-care should be things that are easy for us, not strenuous tasks. But what if some of the ugly, mundane tasks like keeping a planner are actually part of our self-care? I’ve recently been understanding how being a better planner actually reduces my own anxiety. I had gotten into this habit of leaving things to chance. If I was going on a trip I’d choose to be “spontaneous”; this included departing time, hotel rooms, and activities on the trip. I thought I was keeping things “more fun” because I was being spontaneous. I’ve been told by so many people that life is more fun when you’re spontaneous! So I started to try to do less planning and just more doing. Can you guess what actually happened? I’d wake up later than I thought I would so I would leave later than I thought I would. I’d make up an excuse for myself like “Oh, it’s fine I didn’t really care what time I left anyway.” (The first layer to my anxiety.) Then I’d get to where I was going and just start looking for things to do when I was already there. Typically I wouldn’t get much accomplished, but again there was an excuse. “Next time I come I’ll be more productive, it’s no big deal.” (The second layer to my anxiety.) Then it would be time to go find a hotel. I don’t think I even need to explain how challenging this can be if not done in advance. (The third level to my anxiety.) More excuses came. By the time I got home the next day I would feel defeated. My anxiety, stress, and sadness were through the roof. But you know, “It was no big deal” I’d just go get a massage the next day and everything would be better, right?
Look at how much pain and hurt I could have saved myself if I had just put in a little bit of effort to plan rather than be spontaneous! This concept is true of more than just planning your day, week, or month. It’s planning a budget (less stress and anxiety about your money). It’s planning your meals (less stress and anxiety about what to make, or end up not making and then spend money on eating out). Sometimes true self-care is making hard choices because you know that the little bit of sacrifice now will pay off in the long run. It’s creating atomic habits such as gratitude journaling, having a better morning routine, meditating, or working the extra hour to finish a project even when you “don’t have the time”.
Massages, reading, spas, hiking are all good ways to take care of yourself. Stress relief is important. Balance is important. But making choices in our everyday life that help us create a life we love means less having to take a break from our life. Create a life you don’t need to escape from.
I challenge you all to start looking at your day to day life and finding things you can change to help take care of yourself every day. Along with that could be Finding the Positive and gratitude journaling! Start today by leaving your FTP in the comments. As always if you ever need someone to talk to don’t hesitate to contact me! Have a great week and here’s my FTP!
- I’m grateful for friends who put in the effort to keep in touch with me or to visit me! They are never required to take time out of their schedule to stay connected with me, so when they make the choice to do so I really appreciate them. It means a lot to me.
- I’m thankful God provided me with a family that I can go home to for holidays. I’m very blessed by the family he has given me and it’s always a great feeling to go back home to them.
- I’m grateful for the beauty that came after the blizzard this weekend. Mother Nature has a way of having some nasty storms, but the result from it was absolutely beautiful. The frosted trees, wonderful sunshine, and glistening snow really made my drive to work a pretty one.
AT CHOICE 